Whoopi's Blind, Deaf Dog Won't Walk ... So She Sings Him A Poem
A good dog owner is patient with a dog who's too tired to walk any farther. But a great owner turns the situation into a moment of sympathy and compassion.
That's exactly what Whoopi Goldberg did on Tuesday when she was out walking her puppy - and he wouldn't budge. She took a quick video and narrated it from the dog's perspective, and it's a beautiful, poetic riff about puppyhood - all in honor of Bear, who happens to be both blind and deaf.
Below is Whoopi's improvised narration, presented as poetry, and accompanied by images of sleepy Bear-berg.
"Notes From Puppydom" by Whoopi Goldberg
I have had it.
This b**** has walked me
All over God's green acre ...
And I'm tired.
You know, I'm a dog. ... I'm a puppy, really.
And I get a little tired.
And she made me tired.
She took me here and there.
Stuff is all in my face!
I don't know what it is, because ...
I don't know if you know this ...
My name is Bear,
And I'm blind, and I'm deaf.
And my human walker's name is Whoopi.
And she doesn't seem to understand
That I'm a puppy.
I'm a puppy.
Yes, I want to bite at things that aren't there.
I want to dance to the side when I walk.
I want to do all those things.
However, I also want to rest.
And she's like a machine!
She wants me to poop.
She wants me to drink.
She wants me to eat. Oy gevalt!
What a taskmaster she is, but I like her.
... But don't tell her!
Cuz I'm a puppy. And she has to earn it.
You've earned it, Whoopi. For not only caring for this rescue dog, but also articulating your love into such beautiful words.
"One of the problems with a lot of breeding that gets done is, you know, people end up trying to breed for eye color and it destroys the DNA of the dog," said Goldberg on her YouTube show "Rollin' With Whoopi". "This wonderful dog is blind and deaf, but he doesn't know it. He thinks everyone is like this."
Watch Goldberg improvise her poem.
Here are a few other videos of Bear.